Monday, August 2, 2010

The BIG question...

It seems as if everybody is asking Alex and I the BIG question....or at least the humongo one that tends to pop up when you have one child....
who is over 1 year old...
hmmmmm, have you guessed it yet?

Yep....you got it. It's the
 "So when is Forrest getting a sister/brother/playmate/wrestling partner?"
Or...
"Come on what are you waiting for?"
or...my favorite...
"Okay guys, it's TIME! I think Forrest needs a little sister!" 
(not even bothering to frame it as a question mind you...)
I'm not so much bothered by the comments...as I would like to know the answer as well. So....blog readers....family, friends, strangers, everyone in between...
take aside my personal preference for when I want to get pregnant, (as I'm not exactly jumping up and down in joy for it at the moment...and I don't think Alex is for the matter either....those big bellys are hard on everyone!)
What do you think is the best spacing for kiddies....if you could choose...if you were so lucky to be able to time things, (as I know not everybody is....)
Is it..."have them quick as possible.....get those baby years over with.....I love babies and don't mind two under two"
or...."space them out a bit...2+ years is perfect...."
OR...."there is no way I want two kids in diapers....3+ years is the way to go"
ORRRRR "the more time between them, the better..."
I know there are a lot of ways to look at this equation...and obviously any kids I may or may not be having can't be TOOOO close together as Forrest is already 16 mos. old....
Just looking for comments and opinions, not that they would greatly influence our final decisions...and really whatever happens, happens. I already have my biases, as it seems everybody has a thought on the issue, but I'll keep them to myself for now and I would love to hear from all of you! Even those that don't have kiddies or maybe are in my boat and only have one....what are you thinking?

6 comments:

Ashley said...

Nice post Katie!!! hahhaa.. we too hear the "it's almost time to have another" but no pressure really... Todd thinks we should have them close together...we are coming up on 2 yrs apart and we are thinking that is still the plan. Get it over with! Though I hear all sorts of opinions too.

Sadia said...

I don't think there's a perfect spacing. My twins are two minutes apart. My sister and I are 10.5 years apart. My husband and his sister are 13 months apart. I think the sibling relationships would have been the same, no matter the spacing. Kids come pre-wired with their basic personalities!

Nurtureshock has a chapter on sibling relationships, and they found that the age difference didn't affect how well siblings got along.

Whatever works for your family is the right answer for you - emotionally, financially, spiritually!

Roundy Clan said...

Tyler was two and a half when we got pregnant the second time. I think it was really good timing. He was old enough that we got to explain a lot to him and he was able to understand. We get the question about number three and we just smile and tell them that Cody got snipped. HAHA It is so much fun to see the looks on their faces. :)

Sheelagh said...

Well you already got some good advice here. I will say that I have NO idea! I go back and forth all the time about it too. We are obviously on the "get it done" rout.

Addie and Mayzie are 17 months apart, but that was a very happy surprise, not actually a plan of ours.

Addie and Jonah are 28 months apart and that WAS planned. I think it was much much easier on all of us that time around. I think between 2 and 3 years is good, but like everything we all have our opinions for a reason. My reason is that my brother is 6 years older than me and we still aren't very close. My sister and I are just under 2 years apart and we are pretty close off and on. Who knows.

I have plenty of friends who's kids are 3 years apart and that seems great from the outside, a little easier than this house hold anyway. I have also talked to a few moms recently who has a much bigger spread between her kids and she LOVES that. I think what ever you decide, you can't go wrong with a sibling. :-)

John said...

whatever the spacing, it'll work itself out. that said, go for it! ;-)

Fultmeyer Clan said...

thanks all for your very thoughtful commentary. Sadia, thanks for the Nutureshock reference!