Sunday, May 22, 2011

The BIG Brother...

My Forrest. 2 years and 2 months old. This big brother thing has come barreling down on him like a ton of bricks I'm sure. One minute he has his mom and dad all to himself, and the next there is a little being just about permanently attached to me.
Thankfully he has never taken out his frustrations on baby Talin. He remains so gently around the baby. His whole voice and demeanor changes around the baby as he strokes his head, and whispers "baybeeeeeee". :-) and kisses his furry little scalp.
However, in regards to his mama, he has been going through some tough times. I really am not supposed to be lifting him because of the c-section and for the first week I didn't...this was really getting to him and he noticed. All of the sudden I was not his primary care provider AND I couldn't lift him up when he needed something, and just a hug. He also started not letting anyone else in the house take care of him without a big fit. We've had plenty of help, and he loves Craig and Megan, but he wanted MAMA to do it. And then came the tears.
Simply a way to test me to see if I truly could still care for my little 2 year old and an infant.
This was tough. Especially on me and my emotional state. A fear I hear is pretty common when you go from 1 to 2 kids, or maybe add any number to you family is whether or not you are truly capable of the job.  And Forrest's tears, fits, acting out was pushing on that very question. Around day 8 I finally broke down and picked him up from the crib, (it felt fine, I wouldn't have done it if it hurt,) and he hung on to me so tight as if to say "oh Thank you mama, you are still here for me!" It was probably the biggest hug I've ever had from him.
It seems to have gotten a bit better since that point. Poor guy. He doesn't understand why I couldn't lift him up, and why I still shouldn't be lifting him. I tell him I have an "owie" but something isn't quite connecting when he says "up peeease". He still comes to me half the time to help him, even if there are spare hands around, but this is slowly improving too.
 I know we're going to take steps backwards soon, probably when Craig and Megan leave in a few days. Our household will resume its normal size, and my mama skills will truly be tested.
He will be without his normal daycare routine so it will be interesting to say the least.
For the most part though our big brother is rising to the task.
Some current Forrest factoids!
At 26 months he is.....getting ready to potty train! He now runs away when he poops or pees in his diaper so we know that he has enough control to know when its coming. And he STILL hates diaper changes, as do I even more so now that we have 2 kids in diapers. Everybody I talk to says to wait a while after the baby comes to start this process, so next month, potty training here we come!
he is also.....talking more and more. Sentences, some intelligible, most not, but he tries about everything and in the last month his vocabulary has exploded.
Favorite foods are apple juice, (any kind of juice really,) spaghetti, rice, strawberries (which we now have fresh in our garden...!), dressing (yes the kind on salad, sometimes the salad goes with it...), and broccoli.
His favorite toys, Thomas trains and movies, a hula hoop (as of yesterday after watching some hula hoopers at the farmer's market,) his wagon, play-doh, a little silver ball the size of a golf ball, (I have no idea where it even came from,) and his bear animals and going on bear hunts! (we've got several roaming the property this spring and he loves to go on walks, be VERY QUIET (quite amazing!), and see them!
Our little boy has grown before our eyes with Talin joining us. He seems to be bigger everyday next to our newborn. I'm sure this summer will be full of surprises!


Sheelagh said...

I had a similar problem with Jonah. Although for park of the first month he acted mad at me and actually asked for daddy over me. That was tough on the mommy emotions too. Really, any way you slice it, no mom can resist picking up their child when in need, especially when they need/want/ are crying for YOU!
I hope that your body is healing well and does so more and more and quicker and quicker. I hope that your emotions are right along with that healing. It sounds like you are doing well though.
It is so good to hear from you, I am excited with each new post! Thank you for sharing about your family....I LOVE the pic of Forest and Talin! SO sweet! Enjoy!!!

Ashley said...

I'm not looking forward to this, but I know its all part of the package and we shall all get through it! I too look forward to every post to give me a sneak preview into the chaos that will become my life this fall!