"What are you planning for Mother's Day" is the question of the week.
"Having a a baby" is my answer :-)
The cankles are back in force, the last day of scheduled patients is tomorrow, this baby boy had an ultrasound which shows he's as healthy as can be, 7 lbs, 11 oz, and this body is starting to revolt. I'm 2-3 cm dilated and 60 % effaced, though have been that way for a week now, and I absolutely feel the change.
Now, granted, work has been INSANE.
No cutting back, easy, carefree days here. I would have loved that, but it can't always be planned. There are times when I'd rather cut off my right leg than drag it around with me for the day, though the patients I'm trying to treat, make better, improve seem to always be in a worse way than myself.
And there are times I want to snap instead of smile brightly at the 50th person I've seen at the hospital that mutters the words, "You''re still here?" "Is that safe" or "Why don't you go home and put your feet up?" and then in the same breath asks me for orders on 3 pateints at once that desperately need something NOW, or tell me someone is bleeding and needs an extra stitch, or that so and so's family needs a conversation on how we are going to save their leg, their brain, or their life.
And then I catch myself and know that all is okay. After all, it is a hospital. There is never ending need in the hospital, and until I remove myself from the situation, it will follow me. I am still healthy, baby is still well and growing, putting the finishing touches on his big brain, (yep, another big headed Fulton baby according to ultrasound...woopeee!!!), and if there was a medical need, I would have been done with work weeks ago. Afterall, my pain is because soon there will be another life on this planet, a healthy beautiful life, where most of my "work" doesn't have near the beautifiul outcome that I will have in maybe a matter of days.
One of the floors of the hospital where I spend a lot of time rounding currently has 5 nurses pregnant, and myself. We are all about 6 weeks apart, so when we all happen to pass each other in the hall, and see the different sizes of bellys working away it is an amazing reminder of how awesome our bodies can be to grow these little beings and function well enough to work, care for others, and be active and HAPPY with what we're doing while growing human beings!
Moms are quite amazing creatures, my own mom having THREE of us girls is quite an amazing woman, my grandmother having FIVE boys was especially amazing, and having another little one on Mother's day sounds like a grand plan for me.
(for multiple reasons....cankles included!)
So, I'll take it. Leave the flowers at home, I'll take the breakfast in bed later. Having a baby sounds much better :-)